Yesterday, I had to pickup groceries and realized, for the first time in my life, I could not name a single person on a single magazine they sold:

I walked home smug. “I have finally joined the intellectual elite”, I thought. “No longer do I have the time to learn these shallow celebrity names- I, like the rest of the elite, am too busy with complex, weighty thoughts.”

Then, this morning, I woke up forty five minutes late for work and thought, “Shit, I’ll only make it, if I multi-task; I have to get ready by doing two things at once”. So, without a putting a moment’s more of thought into it, I tried to put my socks on, while taking a shower. My brain simply picked to two tasks –at random– and combined them- no additional thought. My foot –thankfully– stopped this nonsense by immediately sending a signal to my brain- a sort of, “hey man this does NOT feel right” remark, as I tried to slip on a black tube sock, in the middle of a hot shower.

Well, it was a good, nine hour run, as a member of the intellectual elite. Obviously, when your best thoughts come from your foot, you are still some where in the middle of the country’s aptitude.